As Long As You Both Shall Live….


“As long as you both shall live.”

*Those are the last words I remember hearing thirty years ago today, May 19, 1984. A few seconds later, I smiled beaming with the words, “I do. Although only a step or two away from me, the minister’s gravelly voice seemed to echo from far, far away. Off in the distance….perhaps bouncing off trees in a lush forest land.

At the time, I had eyes and ears only for the husband to be. There he stood, facing me. His green eyes pierced the blue of my own while he gripped my hands, squeezing them. It was his signal before God that we would always be together. My soon-to-be husband would take care of me, protect me, love me, and be loyal and true. Thirty years later he has proven this together with much more good than I ever imagined.

On our beautiful, warm wedding day in May, the two of us had no idea where the road of life would lead. A fantasy land we did not expect. Nor, the reality we ended up living. Still, neither of us would change a thing. In the end, we have been blessed beyond our wildest dreams.

When families raise a chronically ill child, there is a 75% or greater chance the marriage will end in divorce. My husband and I raised two children living with chronic conditions. Both were diagnosed at very young ages within six months of each other. Our odds of divorcing might have increased a bit at that point…

My husband traveled a minimum of 120 nights a year over a 20 year period as a district manager for an eye care company. He loved his job while I loved it for him. Still, it took a toll on the two of us. When the days and nights were added up, seven years of our marriage were spent apart from one another. I often resented him for being away, while he often resented me for being able to stay. Eventually, we both had breaking points.

When needed, my husband was there for me, taking a short leave of  absence from work. He jumped right in, took care of our boys, washed clothes and even learned to cook! In return, I did the same for him when the time came. Isn’t that what couples do for one another? We sought outside help to work on our marriage…more than once. No, it wasn’t always easy. I guess that’s why it’s called work. But, early on, we decided our marriage was worth it….we were worth it. For our children, for our family, for the whole of us.

There are lessons learned that I’ll pass on to others now that I have the opportunity. Take time…any time for couplehood. A walk in the park, a cup of coffee or a simple hour to hold hands and talk. No, not about the kids! Do not lay blame…ever! It’s okay to cry, go ahead and ask God, why? Find a church, ask for help, don’t be proud, seek support, tell a friend, and take a break for heaven’s sake!

Today as I celebrate my 30th wedding anniversary, I am thankful for the best husband one could ever wish for in life. I thank God for every hardship we ever endured, every lesson ever learned. How wonderful to have lived through ALL of the good times and the bad, the happy and the sad. We have such an enormous history together. Rich, full of memories and moments with more to come, God willing.

Happy Anniversary to my dear husband, with love, forever and always….

*Two years ago when I wrote this post originally, my husband and I were not able to officially celebrate our milestone anniversary. This year, we’re away for a few days, soaking up the sun and sand while celebrating 30 years + two! Blessings to all of you.

 

Because of You


Wordpress Logo

 

 

 

Happy Anniversary with WordPress.com!

You registered on WordPress.com 3 years ago!

Thanks for flying with us. Keep up the good blogging!

 

A surprise for me as I opened my beloved WordPress site.  Three years ago today, I never would have imagined that I’d still be sitting in my burgundy leather office chair, tapping keys to write A.B.C.’s.

Heartfelt thanks to YOU, each and every one who has given me bits and pieces of your life, precious pockets of your time.  My own family has grown from four to six, then six to eight before finally halting at eleven since I began writing here three years ago today. Believe me, I know how difficult it can be to keep up with life, to live your passion while shooting for the stars.

Do not ever think your support has gone unnoticed or is not appreciated.  I thank God for you…..my readers.  For if no one read my words they might be tucked away in a box somewhere.  Stuck under an iron bed of gray, on top of a wooden shelf painted white or out in my garage up in the rafters.  Perhaps my grandchildren might lift the lid to let letters escape.  Sure, they might read them one day.  Maybe….Maybe not?

Instead, my posts are here to share with all who care to read.  I thank you for that, with all the love I have in my heart.

Because of you….Joy in my life.

Kim Gosselin

letters

 

 

 

A Very Special Day


A Very Special Day.  Not for the widow lady who lives lonely down the lane.  Not for the single guy mowing grass for neighbors up the street, nor the divorced mother wrangling children for after school treats.  I am thankful for today and understand how lucky I am.  Fifty percent or more of married couples never have this very special day.

Thirty one years ago on May 19, in a mid-sized town of Michigan near a wavy bay this date was picture perfect.  Skies above were blue, the color of a baby’s blanket in flannel with temperatures wrapped just as warm.  Flowering trees were in bloom, dropping petals atop freshly cut grass in slow motion.  Bradford pear, apple and cherry blossoms in pink, falling…falling…falling.

My little sister helped me choose a gown.  Off the rack it was, white with dots of swiss and tiny bows holding a rose.  It fit like a glove and was the first and only dress I tried on.  Meant to be, like the man I married.

On that very special day I walked down the aisle of my childhood church to say, “I Do.”  Love filled my heart with the knowledge that my soon to be husband was everything he should be.  Loving, Respectful, Kind and Loyal.  He carried strong values and very much wanted a family, like me.

Our road together wasn’t always easy.  Chronic Conditions dealt us a blow while dealing us a hand we didn’t understand.  Working together, we never gave up.  Sometimes we sought help from others.  No shame in that.  Without it, our marriage might have ended on the other side of the fifty percent.  What a waste that would have been.  So many blessings in the end.  A lesson for others perhaps.

Today, I have lived more of my life with the man I married than without.  Yes, he’s what I expected walking arm in arm on a runner of white.  Yet, he’s so much more than that.  My husband has been the very best father to our sons, setting positive examples for them to follow in his own quiet, humble way.

Since becoming a grandfather, I marvel at the kick in his step and the magic in his moods.  A storybook character, he is!  One who plays dress-up in turquoise tulle, dances in flirty butterfly heels and disguises his voice while reading paper pages popping from a spine.  Tea parties are shared around a table of square and nature lessons are given in the back of our yard.

Recently our only grandson turned one.  He too now reaches for Grandpa, while lifting arms to beg with saucer blue eyes.  “Pick me up,” they say.  Soon afterward, my husband’s nose is squished flat, turning red from the bottom of a pudgy fist.  His hair of black is magically pulled short to long.   Wet lips twist and curl to laugh aloud while fingers of four or five are stuffed between his teeth in a new game of play.

As for me, I feel so lucky to have had this wonderful man by my side for the past thirty-one years.  Never do I take a day for granted and I thank God for all of our blessings.

Given the chance, I would put on that dress all over again.  White with dots of swiss and little bows holding a rose.

A Very Special Day…

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

 

 

Come Celebrate With Me!


To my surprise I discovered this is my first anniversary here at WordPress.  Yes, today, October first!  I can hardly believe it!!  I never would have known if I hadn’t written a post today or checked my site.  There it was.  In the upper right hand corner, an unusual looking symbol…something I had never seen before.

Of course I clicked my mouse, wondering what it was all about.  Was there an announcement of some sort?  Had I won a prize, perhaps?  Well, yes and yes….

An announcement it was for me.  Happy “ONE YEAR” Anniversary!  And, the prize, you ask?  Actually, I’ve won many prizes this past year here at WordPress.  More than I can count!  You and you and you and you…..

When I started this blog a year ago today, I hadn’t written much of anything in a very long time.  Oh, sure, I signed my name on the bottom of checks, wrote lovely Christmas cards and e-mail letters, but not much else.  A good thing I guess, since there were no blogging expectations inside my headLooking back, I simply felt words wanting to spill out of me.

During this past year I have learned so much from all of you!  There is a warmth of friendship from people all around the globe. You have supported me unconditionally and helped me to become a far better writer than I was a year ago.  How can I ever begin thank you for that?

So today I’m celebrating my very first anniversary by thanking each and every one of you the only way I can.  Thank you for all that you have given to me…..from my heart to yours.

Blessings,

Kim 

 *Go ahead, have a piece of cake.  I baked it just for you..  🙂

365 Days, 231 Posts, 3,298 Commentss

 

As Long As You Both Shall Live…..


“As long as you both shall live.”

*Those are the last words I remember hearing thirty years ago today, May 19, 1984.  A few seconds later, I smiled beaming with the words, “I do.” Although only a step or two away from me, the minister’s gravelly voice seemed to echo from far, far away. Off in the distance….perhaps bouncing off trees in a lush forest land.

At the time, I had eyes and ears only for my soon to be husband. There he stood, facing me. His green eyes pierced the blue of my own while he gripped my hands, squeezing them. It was his signal before God that we would always be together. My soon-to-be husband would take care of me, protect me, love me, and be loyal and true. Thirty years later he has proven this together with much more good than I ever imagined.

On our beautiful, warm wedding day in May, the two of us had no idea where the road of life would lead. A fantasy land we did not expect. Nor, the reality we ended up living. Still, neither of us would change a thing, given the choice. We have been blessed beyond our wildest dreams.

When families raise a chronically ill child, there is a 75% or greater chance the marriage will end in divorce. My husband and I raised two children living with chronic conditions. Both were diagnosed at very young ages within six months of each other. I’m guessing our odds of divorcing might have increased at that point…

My husband traveled a minimum of 120 nights a year over a 20 year period as a district manager for an eye care company. He loved his job while I loved it for him. Still, it took a toll on the two of us. When the days and nights were added up, seven years of our marriage were spent apart from one another. I often resented him for being away, while he often resented me for being home to stay.  Eventually, we both had breaking points.

When needed, my husband was there for me, taking a short leave of  absence from work. He jumped right in, took care of our boys, washed clothes and even learned to cook! In return, I did the same for him when the time came. Isn’t that what couples do? We sought outside help to work on our marriage…more than once. No, it wasn’t always easy. I guess that’s why it’s called work. But, early on, we decided our marriage was worth it….we were worth it. For our children, for our family, for the whole of us.

There are lessons learned that I’ll pass on to others, now that I have the opportunity. Take time…any time for couplehood. A walk in the park, a cup of coffee or a simple hour to hold hands and talk. No, not about the kids! Do not lay blame…ever! It’s okay to cry, go ahead and ask God, why? Find a church, ask for help, don’t be proud, seek support, tell a friend, and take a break for heaven’s sake!

Today as I celebrate my 30th wedding anniversary, I am thankful for the best husband one could ever wish for in life. I thank God for every hardship we endured, every lesson learned. How wonderful to have lived through ALL of the good times and the bad, the happy and the sad. We have such a tremendous history filled with life riches together. Memories and moments, and more to come, God willing.

Happy Anniversary to my dear husband, with love, forever and always….

*Two years ago my husband and I never had an opportunity to officially celebrate our anniversary. So we’re off for a few days, enjoying the sun and sand while celebrating thirty years + two! Blessings to all of you.